So a couple weeks ago, a certain person re-added me as a friend on Facebook. Before I was blocked, some for good reasons, I think the whole situation that led up to that was completely blown out of proportion. That particular incident happened in January and I believed that's when I was blocked. Well this whole time I was just praying and hoping that I would be re-added. I know it sounds weird, but I have my reasons, anyway, much to my surprise one morning I wake up with the friend request.
I've been chatting with this person for a little bit every once in a while, and I have to say, now, I don't understand what the big fuss was about.
I'm going say that it's because I've become a lot more mature. Which, I have. I can see it, and other can see it. I'm learning how to handle things differently. And damn it, I'm going to pat myself on that back and say I'm proud of myself.
I was in a bit of transitional period earlier this year. I'm still in the phase, but becoming more and more comfortable with everything, but I still want that fresh clean start. Ya know?
A few weeks ago, we had mock interviews for grad school, and at the end of the interview we were asked, "What's something that will make us remember you?"
YIPES!
I wanted so very badly not to give the, "We can benefit from each other for this program..." bull shit. What sets me apart from every one else? As an artist? As an actor? As a human?
And I still don't know!
I have until February to figure it all out.
Besides that, I'm trying to keep my head above water in school. I'm playing Kolenkhov in "You Can't Take it With You" and he has a Russian accent, and I feel like I'm failing miserably at it to be honest. Hopefully it comes together, I don't feel like I'm at a place personally that I need to be.
I also just ordered a Jimmy Johns sandwich, and half of the stuff I requested is missing.... I'm a little ticked.
OK so this is a little journaly, but oh well.
I never have realized how important friends are. I mean I've always liked mine and appreciated them. But this past month has been pretty nuts, and to see friends get together for encouraging words really makes me turn into an old sap.
A couple of my friends had a rough time with some family issues, and just seeing their facebook and seeing the amazing things people have to say to them really is inspiring. Also there was a very unfortunate incident on the first of the month, and I was fine, I mean I was shaken but I wasn't as close to this person, more like acquaintances, but still, my heart hurt for him. The particular incidence (I just debated on whether or not I should talk about what happened or not) an 18 year old committed suicide because he was different and was picked on at school. I got a text from a friend that read,
"I'm really, really sorry that this is a text. But ______________ killed himself today. I don't know any details, but you're one of my best friends Dylan and I don't ever want to lose you"
That text fo real made me cry like a big 'ole baby. I don't know how to explain this next part, but I don't remember ever a time I went to friends before I went to family.
I am a HUGE family person. My family means the absolute world to me, and I have gone to them for many many many things. But for this, I didn't feel like I needed to, I went to friends for comfort.
When did my friends become SO important to me? And if is a bad thing it took me this long?
Anyway, I'm outta here. Got homework to do!
- Dylan Mark Lewis
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